Monday, March 9, 2009

Have You Been RAPED?!


What does it feel to be RAPEd?! Read this message from the HR Department. If you are a RAPE victim, find out the available remedies for you. Eheh.

Dear employees,

Due to the current financial situation caused by the slowdown of economy, Management has decided to implement a scheme to put workers of 40 years of age and above on early retirement. This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to management to be eligible for the SHAFT scheme (Special Help After Forced Termination). Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the SCREW program (Scheme Covering Retired Early Workers). A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as Management deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED can only get AIDS (Additional Income for Dependants & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel Early Severance). Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or SCREWED any further by Management.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much SHIT (Special High Intensity Training) as possible. Management has always prided itself on the amount of SHIT it gives employees. Should you feel that you do not receive enough SHIT, please bring to the attention of your Supervisor. They have been trained to give you all the SHIT you can handle.

The Management

Received by email from Frnz.



  1. hahaha.. dai lamang tgkagan ki link su Frnz.. hehehe..

    garu familiar ako jan sa SHIT.. hahaha

  2. hahahaha. sorry na. sige, kaganan ko link. :D SHIT?! nagpa-RAPE ka na lang kuta. hahahaha. :p

  3. HAHAHA! Kung bako RAPE, igwang SHET... Anu pa man asahan ta sa source na si FRNZ??!HAHAHA! Anui na ba ang nangyayari sa mundo natin?!

  4. hahaha. basta FRNZ, alam na! :))